#NataliaTheTigerSwan

To all the Queens out there:

Stay positive. Drink Water. Be kind to yourself & to others.

Hold yourself accountable to becoming the radiance you have always been.

Feel joy imagining your abundant future every day.

Work towards it. Call to it. Keep pursuing your biggest dreams.

In a world where systems of oppression are trying to put out your inner light,

You never quite realize just how much your shine impacts others to stay positive &

GET ALL THE LIFE OUT OF LIFE!

I wrote this free verse poem just now because Natalia Bokoum inspires me. As much as I inspire her, it’s really a mutual phenomenon. That’s just a dab of beauty that can occur when two people are sincerely open & are willing to learn from each other.

“Who is Natalia though?” you ask. Natalia is a young-brilliant-music-loving-afro-rocking-Proud-Black-Queer-Queen-Star from Baltimore, Maryland. The universe so generously brought her into my life while I was the Executive Director of DC Jobs with Justice. She was a part of the student community who would turn out to support of actions, rallies, & marches to advance women and workers’ rights in the District. It wasn’t until I started TigerSwan Timeless Boutique though that Natalia & I became closer friends.

In the fall of 2016, I decided to host my first listening party (TigerSwan Presents: A Seat At The Table).

Solange’s album had recently come out & I knew that it was a very special part of the newest Black Arts Renaissance Movement we are experiencing in the US. I wanted to create a relaxed safe space for people to come together, listen to, & process this particular piece of art. I NEEDED to process this with other people because it touched me so deeply. I immediately DM’d Solange on IG to see if she would come to my party. But when that didn’t pan out, I realized that what I really needed was an academic to facilitate the discussion portion of the listening party. And that’s where Natalia more fully entered.

She was the perfect facilitator for this event because she is passionate about exploring & discussing the intersections of culture, race, & gender. She prepped for the event at least a week in advance. She came with a printed facilitators guide. She showed up to the party early to help me set up. She was open with communicating her vision for the discussion part of the event, & was also flexible with the flow of the evening. She was engaging with guests throughout the evening & made folks feel like they were a welcome part of the conversation. It was after that event that I knew for sure that this young person was going to go far in life. In my experience, most 20 year olds are not yet that organized or confident in public speaking. It was clear to me that Natalia was & still is wise beyond her years.

After the event we mutually decided that I would take her under my wing as a mentee & TigerSwan assistant. We would meet at least once a week to process the difficulties & joys of life, and from time to time I would give her a TigerSwan related assignment. For her, my time, company & boutique became a safe retreat from the elite private university world she usually occupied as a student. TigerSwan became a space for her personal learning & growth in a way that she couldn’t seem to find in the perfectly manicured lawns or ‘content’ professors, students, & residents of Ward 3. Natalia was & is acutely aware & articulate about the injustice she sees & feels daily. She couldn’t seem to find her tribe at American University & this seemed to cause her pain.

Aside from our regular weekly conversations, she would allow me to style her as the queen that she naturally is and take her portrait. We had some very moving portrait experiences together. You see, like so many women, grrrls, and femmes out there – Natalia sometimes struggles to stay connected to her inner light. She sometimes forgets how brilliant, beautiful, and powerful she naturally is. During our portrait time together, she would allow me to agitate her so she could remember and get reconnected to herself. And when she would finally open, it was a huge relief. I could literally see the muscles in her body relaxing. I could see the dark feelings she had about her life occupy her throat, and then be released by a gorgeous smile. Sometimes laughter. Sometimes tears. But always relief and healing. Always she allowed me to capture her ability to carry on and shine through in her portraits.

I am proud to say that Natalia is travelling around the United States discovering life! She is currently bossing at life in Houston, Texas. She is brave. She is capable. She is a good navigator and is being navigated by our ancestors. She is finding her truth and coming into her power. She is healing and getting new cuts from life at the same time. She is a queen who does not yet realize how much her example inspires others. But she will one day and when she does, I hope she feels lovely!

She recently wrote this about her style therapy experience with TigerSwan. I am humbled to share her words:

“In my experience, the TigerSwan Timeless Boutique style therapy session was an integral step in my healing process after a long hospital stay. Changes to my psyche, my body shape and size, as well as my self-esteem, had changed rapidly & this therapy session was very helpful to me.

From my style beforehand, which as a mixture of the few clothes I could still fit rather than things that reflected my desired look, Nikki curated a wardrobe for me that encompassed elements of each of my style icons in both clothing & accessories. Through the session I learned fashion history of certain types and styles of clothing, as well as vocabulary I was not accustomed to, such as the difference between what I thought was a crown but was actually a 'diadem'. Nikki will talk you through the core of what your style/aesthetic is, even if you aren't quite sure what to call it (which I couldn't before). Encompassing my androgynous aesthetic & my re-obsession with The Matrix, in this appointment, I left with a prime condition vintage Polo blazer, a Jos. A. Bank trench, & even a tiara. I couldn't figure out a reason to ever need or wear a crown, but Nikki's collection has so much variety and stand out pieces that are contagious. The tiara actually looks fantastic as an accessory to my afro puffs. While she assured me not to break my budget, her inventory was accommodating to my size, my bust, & budget. Even statement pieces she recommended, but I did not prefer, she simply found something else we both thought was great for me.

Overall, I loved my appointment, & since then have been more vibrant in my clothing and accessory choices which has come to reflect my growing confidence in my presentation. I have also been feeling a glow of health & wellness like never before, which has been noticed by my friends. Style therapy isn't shopping at the mall or online; a professional style therapy session with Nikki will make you more in tune with your style, your body, & the power that clothes & accessories can illuminate within you.”

I sincerely thank Natalia for these kind words, & also for her friendship, trust, & courage. Natalia’s confidence is beautiful & necessary in this world. I am excited not only for her, but for her generation’s transformational impact on the world that we have yet to fully see. It is people like Natalia who are redefining identity & smashing stereotypes in order to get us all more free.

Please enjoy these dignified portraits of the one and only #NataliaTheTigerSwan. I chose to present her in purple because of the color's significant historical association with royalty & because of Natalia's ability to defy & rewrite oppressive narratives. Together we flip the script about who's royal, who's dignified, & who's worthy of being seen/heard/felt.